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Thursday, January 05, 2006

b. a. d.

beat.  angry.  disappointed.  

i started to write.

then everything stalled.  sentences come out jumbled and ugly.  thoughts came flying unorganized and chaotic.

how do you translate the anger you feel into words?  the kind of anger that “fuck you” won’t suffice.  the kind of anger where you can only laugh to avoid spontaneous combustion.  the kind that keeps you up at night, causing your heart rate to spike, your ears to burn.

how do you explain the disappointment you feel?  the type that makes you question your previous judgments and reevaluate them one by one, just to avoid being disappointed like this ever again.  the kind that reaffirms your belief that humans aren’t intrinsically good.  the kind that makes you trust others even lesser now.  the kind that makes you become even more cynical about everything around you.

if this is any indication of how 06 will be, please, someone, please run me over with a car.

4 Comments:

Blogger lb said...

what the hell happened?

January 05, 2006 11:17 PM

 
Blogger Epic Dude said...

Sorry homes.

:(

January 06, 2006 9:49 AM

 
Blogger Me said...

I totally understand what you mean.
Very.

Take it easy Ed.

January 08, 2006 10:04 PM

 
Blogger geesmo said...

hey ed, hope the disappointment dissipates soon and your faith in humanity restored. want me to send you some 3 in 1 instant kopi? :-)

January 09, 2006 2:09 PM

 

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